Sisters

She watches the little one,
looking out of the window.
The worn out doll,
clutched tight.
Too young to understand, yet
deep within, does she know?

Her heart aches more than her arms,
cradling the kid all night long.
Having to grow up in a moment,
her own childhood gone.
The tears remain unshed,
for ever and more.

"Can you call mommy again?
She should be home by now."
Innocent eyes look up to her.
Trusting the world’s
convenient lies.

She tries to hold her close
and whisper the truth,
as it should be told.
"She won’t answer the phone, little one.
Mom is not coming home anymore"

© Chhaya


image by William Adolphe Bouguereau (Two Sisters)

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the Month of the Departed

Yes, I have always had this habit of vanishing without a warning. I am like this even in my offline life. Sticking to one thing and one place has always been a struggle for me. Strings scare me. Visible or otherwise.

Still, if you wanna know why I have been inactive for almost a month, then here are a few reasons I can think of –

First of all, work pressure was simply mind-numbing. I was trying hard to find that 1441st minute in the day. Never could.

And then I fell sick. I mean, really sick. (why does the word –sick, always sound like a dirty word to me?) Fever, cold, cough, breathing troubles and an insane headache that simply refused to go away. Had a Swine Flu scare too, but thankfully I didn’t have H1N1 infection. It was perhaps just the simple Flu trying to tell me that it can be as painful as the Pig version!

But the most disturbing thing that happened was that one of my Grandparents passed away. I know, Death is inevitable. I have no beef with the Grim Reaper. We have made our peace a long time back.

December is the month when he likes to visit. Plucking away a few people from my life.

I have lost too many to this Month. People who mean something to me. Sometimes more than something. Its the Month of the Departed for me....

A friend asked if we were close. I found myself at loss for words. How close is considered to be close? If you go by the society’s parameters then I don’t think I am close to anyone in my life. There is just 1 exception to that. If you know me then you know who that person is.

I am still to shed a tear. Don’t think I am going to. (I can sense one of my regular readers shaking his head and saying – u gotta cry girl). The reason is – I had sensed it coming. I knew I was going to lose that person. I had even talked about it with one of you. And this is the part that disturbs me the most. Every time I am about to lose someone, or every time something terrible is going to happen to me, I always sense it a few days in advance. I don’t know how it happens. Perhaps it happens to everyone.

I never try to stop it from happening or think about it like they show in the movies. It’s disturbing.

There is more to write, but I am saving it for the next post. Gotta have something to share :)

Love
Chhaya

The image is Googled

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Ecstasy

Yes, I know, I have been really irregular. But no, this time I wasn’t travelling or recharging my batteries by going off the grid. As some of you know, workload has been really brutal. There are days when I have to manage with 2-3 hours of sleep (with dreams full of dancing numbers and data :D).

Last couple of day were different.

12th Nov, I was trying to stay afloat, juggling a million things and was cribbing to E about a faulty link @ cricinfo (I am a big time cricket fanatic, in case you didn’t know).

He asked me a question - heard of kluelesS?

I hadn’t. ( I was prepared for a round of – How lame! You don’t even know KluelesS! Hawww! Shame Shame! from his side. The usual. But I guess he was too busy himself to throw some class insults :P)

Klueless 5 a kind of puzzle, with several insane levels to crack (in case you don’t know), hosted by the IIM guys. It’s an annual event.

E sent me the link and as soon as I saw the Klueless 5, I knew I was in trouble. The guy indeed knows some of my weaknesses and I am sure he was trying to get me fired. ( he almost got his wish!!!)

Level 1 to Level 38.

There were some pictures and some clues (some of them pointing in the wrong direction). You don’t even know what you are looking for!!!! There are text boxes that can’t be typed in and there are buttons that can’t be clicked.

It took me 3 days to solve it. Yes, I could have done it in 2, but then gotta work and take care of other things.

One fact that amused me was that I was getting slightly sad when I reached the level 38.
The ecstasy of solving those crazy puzzles was coming to an end. As usual, my over analytic mind went into searching for parallels. And I thought, is this why the Joker didn’t wanna kill Batman? Is this why Sherlock Holmes would look for heroine when he had no exciting case to solve?

And then i realized. They don’t exist. I do. What does that make me? Insane, as some would love to point out..

Every time I crib about work –pressure, I am keenly aware of the fact that at least 40% of it is because I am addicted to things that make me think.

How can I forget the way I slept like a baby after cracking 6 levels of Klueless 5 in one hour. My mind was satisfied. It was a high like no other.

And now I am thinking.... what now?

I envy those people who can actually enjoy a day off. I am so jealous of those who can wake up at 11 am on a Sunday. My eyes are open at 6 and my mind never sleeps...

Has anyone ever died of thinking too much? :)

Just a thought


Love

Chhaya
btw, my blog has been featured. Click here to read/leave a word there.


PS: I know, this post is very different from what I write. Hope you are not too disappointed.

PS: I am not posting the answers/hints to Klueless 5 levels here as it attracts misdirected hits. I don’t want crowd.
In case you wanna solve it. Here is the link – (HOF was filled even before I started, so don’t dream about it)

And no, don’t expect help from me. It’s something you must do on your own.

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