Glory
Monday, November 3, 2008
She denounces,
tempting shadows.
Burning scalding sky
Parched lips, mocking eyes
Breaths come in gasps
endless, frozen desert
She stands tall carrying
tombstone too heavy
Gaping wounds she ignores
Stubborn, she smiles
Time, destiny, morals, fate
Greedy vultures - salivate
She wears her sins
with love and pride
Heaven flashes its wrath
Helpless, Longinus cries
She opens her arms
claiming dark victory.
They kill her carcass
Soul infidel tells a story
© 2008 by Chhaya. All rights reserved
PS: the image is googled
11 comments:
wow.. this is a really good piece... i like it a lot... to me it reveals another side of humans... a darker side but still there is passion & glory found somehow
thanx 4 still reading my blog... i appreciate that!
Uff its very interesting this one, really :)
Im so confused about....who is she? What its your opinion? x)
PS: come on, do something about nature/world or something around that :P
@Sao
sometimes, words like glory has different meaning for different people, i am just trying to play with fire here. lol...
@Outsider
She is someone who is standing up to fate, i will write about this poem in detail on my other blog (thhe dancing with devil blog) later, but first, i wanna get some unbiased feedback. abt the nature thing, ok ok.. lol... will try :)
I love reading you poetry. It really makes me think. I have a little award for you over at my blog here
Sharon
nice piece of work,
to me...
it seems that she is just a person too focussed on her goals, kind of person who doesnt care about wrong or rite as far as her goals are achieved, as if what she is doing is programmed in her genes.
end lines kind of suggests whatever one's goals might be wether they are achieved or not, at the end death overcomes everything and nothing matters
I am still a rookie at poem writing but what meaning my mind derives is that of a girl molested by the devils of society and she bearing the tombstone(a child within), and telling the tale of her miseries
I mean I may be interpretting incorrectly but thats the meaning coming to my mind as of now.
@Ankit...
no ankit. this poem is not about that... its about a love that is considered sinful, when u are not supposed to wish for the one you love, yet you are so lost, u wear that sin with pride. read the poem again, shud make sense now.. the woman here, refuses to let go of the man she loves.
@Chayya
Yup getting your view now, sometimes it gets difficult to get the poets view as we tend to be deviated by our own experiences. :)
its nice for me to read these poems.. (especially with comments)..bcoz.. i can get various ways to map your poems..
Again, yet another enigmatic piece! I love your write as it reminds me of some of my writes.
I like the style, where you first mention the condition, and then her/his response. And, interestingly, you do that merely by separating them with a comma. That is nicely done!
Okay, about the meaning; I am sensing penance here. After having done wrong, she realizes of her mistakes. Inevitably, she has to go through religiously believed customs of sufferings.
She sustains all of them, she survives all of them as she strongly believes she did the wrong as she was helpless. Or, she did it out of love. Therefore, she still embraces her ideally "dark victory".
So, this is "dark", strictly through others lenses as they do not know what she has gone through. They do not know the entire story.
She is helpless as even "heaven" did not notice it completely. So, her cries go unanswered.
Brilliantly done! Loved this piece! This is one of your most finest pieces! Keep them coming!!!
@Brosreview - "she did it out of love." yes Ajey.. she knows that what she did or is doing is wrong and immoral.. but she did it out of love..and a part of her believes that it was not a sin, not in her eyes..
Ayn Rand's objectivism is one of the inspirations behind this one.
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