Monday, December 7, 2009
Yes, I have always had this habit of vanishing without a warning. I am like this even in my offline life. Sticking to one thing and one place has always been a struggle for me. Strings scare me. Visible or otherwise.
Still, if you wanna know why I have been inactive for almost a month, then here are a few reasons I can think of –
First of all, work pressure was simply mind-numbing. I was trying hard to find that 1441st minute in the day. Never could.
And then I fell sick. I mean, really sick. (why does the word –sick, always sound like a dirty word to me?) Fever, cold, cough, breathing troubles and an insane headache that simply refused to go away. Had a Swine Flu scare too, but thankfully I didn’t have H1N1 infection. It was perhaps just the simple Flu trying to tell me that it can be as painful as the Pig version!
But the most disturbing thing that happened was that one of my Grandparents passed away. I know, Death is inevitable. I have no beef with the Grim Reaper. We have made our peace a long time back.
December is the month when he likes to visit. Plucking away a few people from my life.
I have lost too many to this Month. People who mean something to me. Sometimes more than something. Its the Month of the Departed for me....
A friend asked if we were close. I found myself at loss for words. How close is considered to be close? If you go by the society’s parameters then I don’t think I am close to anyone in my life. There is just 1 exception to that. If you know me then you know who that person is.
I am still to shed a tear. Don’t think I am going to. (I can sense one of my regular readers shaking his head and saying – u gotta cry girl). The reason is – I had sensed it coming. I knew I was going to lose that person. I had even talked about it with one of you. And this is the part that disturbs me the most. Every time I am about to lose someone, or every time something terrible is going to happen to me, I always sense it a few days in advance. I don’t know how it happens. Perhaps it happens to everyone.
I never try to stop it from happening or think about it like they show in the movies. It’s disturbing.
There is more to write, but I am saving it for the next post. Gotta have something to share :)
The image is Googled