Summer Night

Thursday, May 6, 2010

The cotton t-shirt sticks to my back like a second skin. The heat is almost unbearable. Slightest hint of a breeze gives me goose bumps... making me feel alive, even for that fraction of a second. Like love. Ever been in love with someone who didn’t even know that you existed? Waiting for that one look, waiting for that one time when they would actually have a notion about your true feelings?

Just an observation.... before you jump to conclusions.

Being a writer has its perks... and at the same time, you are living 24x7 with a mind that simply won’t stop. Talking to you in your head. Making you look for undercurrents in relationships... and warning you of dangers that might exist just in your head.

And not to forget being judged when you write about the dark abyss of human mind. People wondering if you are a raging lunatic. Getting unwanted sympathies when you try to explore the realms of heartbreaks and what makes us hurt the people we care the most for...

Words and characters dance around in my head while I watch the city rush past. My fear of heights under control as I sit in the dark, perched on the banister of the nth floor. The roads are flooded with lights. somehow looking more alive in the night than it does during the day.

I think about the last two stories still floating around in my head... and I wonder... why do happy endings seem incomplete to me?

Is this the reason I haven’t been able to write them down?

they say things always become happy in the end... but do they?

Does a fairytale princess wake up one morning to realize that she didn’t actually intend to live in the castle. Or be a princess. Or be with Prince Charming?

What if all she wanted was to roam the moor...

what if she didn’t want to have pearls on her neck?

What if she wanted to go barefoot...

What if she didn’t like glass slippers?

Will the story still be worth telling? Or even more so?


©2010 by Chhaya. All Rights Reserved

PS: as usual, I request you to read it as just a piece of writing. the image is googled.


RHYTHM AND RHYME May 6, 2010 at 7:58 PM  

I really enjoyed this, I write poetry and I am always on the look out for a subject for my next poem......even at night I may wake up and think of somethng. Seems like my mind is switched on 24/7. Thanks for a wonderful read.


Maya May 6, 2010 at 8:01 PM  

yeh i m tired of my mind too, i dont know i guess sometime i might just go nuts,,,
sometimes its a time pass and sometimes its just so annoying,

Anonymous,  May 6, 2010 at 8:16 PM  

as usual u make the reader think :)


Vicki Lane May 6, 2010 at 8:28 PM  

Yep, that writer's mind is a blessing and a curse. One's often at a bit of a remove from life, thinking about how best to put it into words...

Brian Miller May 6, 2010 at 9:26 PM  

yep you got that right...sometimes we just have to let the write itself...

Opaque May 7, 2010 at 2:56 AM  

Every story is worth telling. Fantasy and reality create a middle ground somewhere. Although I'm not a big fan of the middle-ground, this is just sometimes how it goes on to be. Fantasy, although may generate hope and a smile or two; it's like looking at life from the wrong end of the telescope. But, coming to think about it, reality is hard to find now. Everything is exaggerated! Fantasy exercises the brain.

Lunacy is denying the dark side of the human brain. Everyone has a bright and a dark side. Exploring and acquainting one with the dark side "might" prevent one from wrongdoings.

Being cautious is good, being a pessimist is not.

jonna May 7, 2010 at 1:42 PM  

well..i can relate with the first few questions..i certainly experienced that :D

and yeah..considering other possibilities will definitely break the usual and cliques of stories..nice thoughts :)

(p.s. check out my latest post if you have time,,.thanks :3)

vicious May 7, 2010 at 9:44 PM  

loved every word , every bit , every thought , every emotion and every conflict in this ..
made my day ..

Pete May 8, 2010 at 8:50 AM  

Hi Chhaya

Your prose soars :)

I can really identify with para 3 and 4.

Especially when you mention 24x7, undercurrents and danger. As you you already know I write about current and future security "information" issues (much of it "off-blog") which mean I'm always thiinking up dark possibilitlies and scenerios. People say "don't be so negative" but we all have our specialities.

I've found that humour often cynical like watching "Catch 22" is the best antidote.

"lunacy" often comes into it as well - providing an alternative way of thinking for the observer and sometimes explaining the mindets/motivations of subjects.


PointSingularity86 May 8, 2010 at 7:29 PM  

Summer's taken break here in Pune, its raining for a change :P
its simply amazing how u express specifics of a state of mind- the questions it churns out.
Excellent work, lady!!! :)

batsick May 8, 2010 at 8:27 PM  

Sounds like a good story. I love to be in another's perspective because it feels so real! Please come over to my blog at

I'm not doing my Magpie this week for another reason.

D.Dasgupta May 8, 2010 at 9:30 PM  

I read this and felt you have matured a great deal in terms of writing skills.

I understand of course why happy endings are logically and emotionally incomplete. I like stories that take you to the end and force you to ask: And then what?

Life is too incomplete an event to be completed by force. That's too artificial, too unreal.

I like it this way. Leave a window open through which people can try and view your soul.


blueapple May 8, 2010 at 11:14 PM  

this is simply the best post of yours!the intro is perfect..conclusion too,but, i feel may be you should hv worked on the conclusion a little more and esp brought in relevance to the title and the mind!!summers and their unromantic and dry!i liked it..'why do happy endings seem so incomplete',while all we search for is a sense of satisfaction and completeness around!it is ironical,because they don't touch us simply as the sad stories do!

buckingfastard May 9, 2010 at 3:33 AM  

story is about the writer..and his/her slippers or no glass slippers...fairy tale will be not as sweet as it is...!!!

every story deserves a good ending...happy or sad... are just perspective of the readers

itsyvitsy May 9, 2010 at 3:27 PM  

The first paragraph of this post has my heart. The way you have described the brief sweeping breeze by showing the similarity of it with that one glance by the one whom you love but who doesn't know you do is extremely beautiful.

For the rest, I can tell "I feel your pain." :-) I am sure you understand what I mean. Haha! Jokes apart, sometimes people always have a say in things that do not concern them. But it is how the minds are tuned to be, to see things outside of themselves but not within themselves. If all could do that we would be having only highly enlightened saints walking on the face of this earth! We need some extroverted people to understand the value of introspection.

The mind can conjure up a million of thoughts but only a few are able to channelize them into beautiful works of art. Be it in form of dance, a painting, poetry, story or other forms. For the rest it is just a "waste of thoughts". So, I feel lucky that sometimes (if not all the time) I am able to convert my thoughts into stories or poetry. And you my friend, are extremely gifted too. Restricting thoughts for the fear of being rebuked or reprimanded is as good as wasting them. Expressing them uninhibited and in an unadulterated manner is what gives it the true form and true emotion. From what I know, you are one of the very few who can really "express".

I liked this post as it touched many topics all at once and at the same time without disturbing the flow as you transitioned your "expressions" from one thought to another.

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:40 PM  

@Yvonne (welcome to my world of poetry) : exactly what I have to go through! and it makes my insomnia even worse!

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:41 PM  

@Uncommon Sense : I m sure your mind goes on much wilder hunts than me :)
I dont exactly feel that I will go nuts bcz of my constant thinking. I guess this is the reason that I m the happiest when I m alone.. a loner who is never lonely :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:42 PM  

@Ashlon : :) .. thank u... its always a pleasure to have someone take a pause and think about what I wrote

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:44 PM  

@Vicki Lane : much like Spider man, the writer mind... the gift, the curse ;)
PS: just to clarify, I m a Batman forever girl :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:49 PM  

@Brosreview : as Orwell said in 1984. A lunatic is perhaps a majority of one.
Dark sides on human mind always fascinates me. Much like extreme sports fascinate many ppl. the adrenaline rush I get while trying to put myself in those fault lines is beyond words ... as you very well know :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:50 PM  

@Ayu : I always check your posts :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:51 PM  

@Vicious : I am so glad you felt that way... :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:53 PM  

@Pete : Oh gee, am I glad to have u back! I hope the degree thingy went well.
I knew you would understand what I say here. sometimes we writers become too engrossed in the bigger picture and miss the daggers... and sometimes we think way too much and miss out of the flowers ... :)

thank u so much for the lovely comment!

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 4:56 PM  

@PointSingularity : You were missed :)
Pune has awesome weather, no doubt. its insanely hot here :(

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 5:09 PM  

@Deep Da : you read my mind ... I always find happy endings bit incomplete. It doesn’t feel natural. bcz something always happens even after the ever after...
I am so happy to hear from u once again. as I said earlier, I feel kind of lost without u around :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 5:11 PM  

@Matsui : I m waiting for ur story u r working on.. so its ok abt the Mag. even I m not writing one this week.
this is not exactly a story. just some thoughts I had on a very hot and unending Summer Night a few days back :)

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 5:14 PM  

@Blueapple : this was not a story and the lack of closure is intentional. its all about not looking for an ending in life... so I wanted the post to have some Qs hanging for the readers.

I am so glad u liked it. missed u @ my blog

Chhaya May 10, 2010 at 5:21 PM  

@Vittal : I have always tried to look for parallels between the material and the emotional ... this is exactly how my mind talks to me. I have typed out a conversation like this, in this post.
abt the Pain Joke... haha... I was LMAO reading that. u know the reason why ;)
I dont remember where I read it... but yes, the best adventures we can have is in our mind. because there is no limitations to the imagination.

taming these wild horses with happy (and always very definite and padlocked) ending always bother me.

some say I m loony... ppl like u say I can express :) ... so thank u!

IdleMind May 11, 2010 at 11:20 AM  

For a change, I am proud of my mind ... though it still doesn't think the way it needs to :)

In case there are visuals that are complete, I prefer to enjoy every part of them. I don't write ones that are too sensitive.

I prefer the not-so-happy endings, there was a time when I loved fairy-tales and their endings. Not anymore, since I feel life teaches lessons ... and we tend to follow life the real way.

Still, it would be nice to talk between the real and the imaginary. The tussle assumes significance when we put them to print ... since we think about those we want to share with.

Glad that you brought the dialogue alive!

John May 12, 2010 at 5:04 AM  

A story does not have to have the prototypical happy ending. An incomplete ending lends itself to the reader a chance to participate, to imagine what that ending might be. That is your ending and that is your style =)

Also, the nighttime for is when I work best! Those thoughts help me pour words into what I write.

Anonymous,  May 12, 2010 at 11:46 AM  

last.. m always last to comemnt..

"why do happy ending seems incomplete to me..??"

some questions have no answers..and if u able to find answers, what to do with them.. if end will b in happy mood, it would look like a hindi movie :P so.. keep alive the story with completion..

Eon Heath May 13, 2010 at 12:53 AM  

Hey Chhaya,

read this the very day you posted...but somehow was in a completely different mindset then, so didnt post any comments...

you have a beautiful way of expressing your thoughts...its perfectly put down...


the silhouette...

Ajai May 13, 2010 at 10:07 AM  

"Give people a fact or an idea and you enlighten their minds; tell them a story and you touch their souls."
Hasidic Proverb

I think if a story has the potential to touch someone's soul... even if it's just your own... then it should be written. :)

rats May 31, 2010 at 5:08 PM  

its hard being a man as it is.
"The cotton t shirt sticks to my back like a second skin".
u just made it worse.
get me out of this hell u tormenter.

blueapple June 4, 2010 at 11:32 PM  

where art thou???
hey where hv u gone:)

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